Ok, so last time I did an entry I was waiting for my op to have my expander removed. I had that done the week after my birthday and it went well and was discharged a couple of hours later. However, the following day I started to feel some, shall we say discomfort on my bum that got increasingly worse to the point I was crying in pain at 3 0'clock in the morning. Because I had a councilling session booked in, I phoned my MacMillan nurse about it and she organised for me to see the radiologist in the unlikely event it was a side effect even after a month. The radiologist took one look and said she'd get the doctor to look when I'd had my counselling (for which I lay on the floor with my legs on the chair). Initially it was obvious the doctor thought I was making a fuss over nothing until she saw the blisters! Immediately offered morphine, got another doctor to look and prescribed all sorts of lotions and potions. It was a 'herpic virus' apparently. Thankfully it cleared up pretty quickly after that. Oh,yeah, during this time I had the scans I've been needing. Four attempts at canulation and a near panic attack in the MRI scanner later... Fun times.
The upshot of the scans was that they didn't think that the chemo had worked as well as they had hoped. My thinking is that it did but the gap between the initial diagnosis and the start of chemo was a few months so it had got bigger. Anyway, I got referred to Guys and sent to have a PET scan (more canulation, bleurgh!), the upshot of which was.... More Chemo!! Otherwise any operation would take 8 hours and they couldn't guarantee that they'd get it all (worst case scenario). So back to the chemo ward I go (4 of 6 tomorrow). I've been using the cold cap this time so I kind of look like a female Magneto... It gets better each time but its not the most pleasant experience. The last two times I've had my best friend with me so we've had a laugh. I think the nurses were surprised that we spent the whole time taking and laughing. I thought we were quite quiet for us, however!!! So far I seem to be coping with it (the oncologist has been pleased) and I haven't noticed any hair loss so fingers crossed!!!
So when this is all done it's more scans- I've already asked for Valium during the MRI- can't be doing with more panic attacks!!
It's by now means been all bad; we've had some fab weekends with my in-laws, our third wedding anniversary (went to Southampton because it turns out that's where hubs realised that he wanted to marry me, bless him!), we even went to Comic Con (for any Marvel Heads, I had my photo taken with Fitz from Agents of SHIELD and asked a question at the Q&A) and we've got four weddings to look forward to!
Again, I've had wonderful support! I joined the Young Breast Cancer Network on Facebook and met a couple of the ladies who live near me- that has been an amazing support (because, lets face it, if it hasn't happened to you, you don't know what it's like!) I've got some great friends in real life and online (who quite frankly shamelessly fuel my Harry Potter obsession haha) as well as wonderful family support as always.
Yes I have down days and get sad and scared and wonder 'why me?', but overall I do try and stay positive. To still a mantra from a certain blue pixar fish- Just Keep Swimming!!
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